The Last Lecture
By
Randy Pausch
(1960-2008)
Byline:
Randy Pausch’s (Carnegie Mellon Professor) last lecture that was televised on public broadcasting served as the inspiration for this essay. I have used Randy’s words in order to keep his message more meaningful.
One commentator captured the essence of Randy’s mood—half humor and half heart.
After seeing the lecture and reading the book, I believe Randy’s most poignant words were:
“I want my kids to know who I am, what I have believed in, and all the ways in which I have come to love them. I wish the kids could understand how desperately I do not want to leave them.
It pains me to think that when they are older, they will not have a father. When I cry in the shower, I am focused on what my children are going to lose more than what I am going to lose.
A parent’s job is to encourage kids to develop a joy for life, and a great urge to follow their own dreams. The best we can do is to help them develop a personal set of tools for the task.
An Injured Lion Still Wants to Roar
Pausch asked the fundamental question “What makes me Unique?”
Pausch felt that all of his accomplishments were fulfilling the dreams and goals of his childhood wanted to be able to convey his story with passion so that he might help others find a path to fulfilling their own dreams.
My Life in a Laptop
Pausch’s last lecture attempted to both catalogue his dreams and then reconnect with others. He wanted to leave a legacy for his 3 children, the oldest who was five.
The Elephant in the Room
Pausch’s father taught him “When there is an elephant in the room, introduce it.
Pausch began his lecture by showing a CT scan of his liver. The slide was headlined “The Elephant in the Room.” Pausch said “we cannot change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand.”
“In the audience’s laughter and surprised applause, it was almost as if I could hear everyone collectively exhaling their anxiety. It was just me. I could begin.”
Really Achieving Your Childhood Dreams
My Childhood Dreams
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Being in zero gravity
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Playing in the NFL
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Authoring an article in the World Book Encyclopedia
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Being Captain Kirk—the leader of the movie series Star Trek
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Winning Stuffed Animals
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Being a Disney Imagineer.
The Parent Lottery
Pausch won the lottery ticket because his parents supported his childhood dreams.
Pausch’s mother enjoyed a wonderful sense of humor. After he received his PhD, she would say: “This is my son. He is a doctor, but not the kind who helps people.”
Pausch fully understood the immense loss to his children from his early death. “Although my children will have a loving mother who I know will guide them through life brilliantly, they will not have their father. I have accepted that, but it does hurt.”
Pausch said that his dad would have reminded him that children need to know their parents love them.
(I know first hand from my experience at DAYTOP-a drug rehabilitation center—that the loss of a parent can lead a child into drugs. That is, the distraught child feels that the dead parent “abandoned” them.)
The Elevator in the Ranch House
When Pausch was growing up, his parents allowed him to paint his bedroom’s walls. His father agreed that the idea was “cool.”
Pausch said this
“I do not know how many more times I will get to visit my childhood home. But it is a gift every time I go there. I look at those crazy walls, I think about my parents allowing me to pain, and I fall asleep feeling lucky and pleased.
Getting in Zero G
“It is important to have specific dreams.”
Pausch obtained his lifelong dream of floating when NASA put him “into the Weightless Wonder.” Pausch convinced NASA to alter policies to permit him this childhood fantasy by promising them publicity. He reminds us just like Dale Carnegie “you need to convince others that in helping you they are helping themselves.”
I Never Made It to the NFL
Pausch loved football and maintained a lifelong affection for his football league coach.
Pausch remembered this advice “When you are screwing up and nobody says anything to you anymore that means they have given up on you.
Football taught Pausch that “you cannot give somebody self-esteem. It is something you have to build.
Pausch believed the lifelong lesson from sports was “teamwork, perseverance, sportsmanship, the value of hard work, and an ability to deal with adversity.”
You Will Find Me under “V”
Pausch’s greatest hope was to provide an article to the World Book Encyclopedia because he was fascinated how it all came together. Pausch achieved his dream. He wrote a piece for Wikipedia called
“Virtual Reality.”
A Skill Set Call Leadership
As a young person Pausch was fascinated with captain, “Kirk” the leader in the television series “Star Trek.”
Pausch undertook a life threatening cure to overcome his pancreatic cancer because Pausch had absorbed a Star Trek lesson. Specifically, Pausch did not believe in the “no-win scenario.”
Winning Big
Pausch learned to do the impossible: winning big stuffed animals at Carnivals. When he was dying he gave them away at his last lecture. A student suffering also from cancer took the elephant.
The Happiest Place on Earth
Pausch got his childhood dream of becoming a Disney Imagineer; however, he had to overcome bureaucratic university obstacles. One dean had the sense to trust the judgment of an outstanding faculty (Pausch’s) member that this was a legitimate place to spend one’s Sabbatical.
Adventures and Lessons Learned
When Pausch and his wife Jai learned of his certain death from cancer, he said to his wife.
“I want you to know it feels great to be alive and to be here today, alive with you. I will not die the next day, or the day after that. So today, right now, well this is a wonderful day. And I want you to know how much I am enjoying it.”
His wife smiled
“I knew then. That this is the way the rest of my life would need to be lived.”
Running the Brick Wall
“Brick Walls are there for a reason. They give us a chance to show how badly we want something.”
Lucy, I’m home (I love Lucy Show)
Randy recounted his response to his wife’s accident that dented both of their cars. His was very supportive and loving toward her. However, he decided not to fix the cars dents. “Not everything needs to be fixed.”
A New Year’s Story—Dealing with a Crisis
Pausch’s attitude was “Let us saddle up and ride.” Do not feel sorry for yourself, but rather just keep on going.
Pausch’s Tips
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Time must be explicitly managed, like money
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You can always change your plan, but only if you have one.
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Ask yourself: Are you spending your time on the right things?
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Develop a good filing system
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Rethink the telephone
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Delegate
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Take a time out
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I will take an earnest person over a hip person
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Sometimes, with the passage of time, and the deadlines that life imposes, surrendering becomes the right thing to do.
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Do not complain. Just Work Harder
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Treat the disease, not the symptom
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Do not obsess over what people think
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Look for the best in everybody
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Watch what they do, not what they say
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Loyalty is a two-way street
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All you have is what you bring with you
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Tell the Truth all the time
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Never give up
The Promised Land
“It is OK that I won’t set foot in the Promised Land. It is still a wonderful sight.”
Jai (Randy’s wife) and Me
“I cannot imagine rolling over in bed and you are not there.” I cannot imagine taking the kids on vacation and you not being with us.
Please do not die”
The Dreams will come to you
“It is not about how to achieve your dreams. It is about how to lead your life. If you lead your life the right way, the karma will take care of itself. The dreams will come to you.”